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I never said anything about the spelling or grammar of the story. Indian Porn Cya Later:)
Thel20anonymous readerReport 2013-05-10 10:58:11I’m not going to say it was bad but i will say that you really need to start proof reading. 8 s«12»anonymous readerReport 2013-05-12 06:16:48To the person who ed on my previous . You really have to work on your writing. I never said anything about the spelling or grammar of the story. There was no build-up and no flow. Also sex scenes need to be expanded and have more detail, describe it more, say what there bodies look like, how the’re feeling that sort of thing, The thing with her friend was kind of strange. Well not here anyway. I’m not talking about one little mistake here, for the amount of text the errors were quite prolific.anonymous readerReport 2013-05-10 17:39:21hard to follow so i read a few bits twice but in the end it was goodanonymous readerReport 2013-05-10 17:32:30Okay, so i normally don’t do this but i felt like doing it now.















