First of the story felt rushed. Indian sex I never said anything about the spelling or grammar of the story. So like i said really work on your writing and proof read it be for posting. Cya Later:)
Thel20anonymous readerReport 2013-05-11 18:47:24Writing was quite rushed and the grammar quite terrible. My advice is to rewrite this and proof read it to make sure it works well before posting it. So like i said really work on your writing and proof read it be for posting. You probably don’t submit stories but if you’re gonna knock someone for spelling and grammar at least have your own shit in order!!! Cya Later:)
Thel20anonymous readerReport 2013-05-11 18:47:24Writing was quite rushed and the grammar quite terrible. Also sex scenes need to be expanded and have more detail, describe it more, say what there bodies look like, how the’re feeling that sort of thing, The thing with her friend was kind of strange. I never said anything about the spelling or grammar of the story.
